Come to think of it, I've never wanted to be like Britney nor Christina when I was small.
It's sort of peculiar how these days, the media-driven society has its general ideals of what absolute beauty is: an immaculate, soft skin, silky hair, a hot muscular body, vogue clothing, etc. (the meaning of the word even varies depending on the culture and country)..
Well, as for me, I think I don't know what to make of that.
The other day, I hung out with a friend of mine who I have seldom seen these past several months due to neglectful lack of time. Ergo, we decided to go window shopping and to buy some coffee and sit down at a petite gourmet café to catch up on each other's lives.
So that's exactly what we did.
At first, to be quite honest, moments of awkwardness haunted our discourse: it was during our stay at the café that I began to become more talkative and to feel that more familiar air.
We then also talked about the problems of the world like we used to do before.
... and I realized how much I had missed that.
Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that I had an epiphany on that day.
As I observed her (I analyze everyone during conversations), I realized how lost I was... how lost I actually am and how little I have accomplished.
Remember what I mentioned about ''absolute beauty''? Well, I think my view on that is a tad bit different from that of the media:
for me, beauty is strength in character.
Tolerance. Sharpness. Charisma. Observant and questioning.
Beauty is always willing to learn; sociable.
Eloquence. Affectionate. Devotion. Charm and maturity.
In other words, for me, beauty is measured emancipation.
... and that's precisely what I noticed in her...
... yet also what I have failed to achieve.
I never had an ideal; a role model.
The only thing I've consequently strived for in that sense is to reach these standards of ''beauty'' I have set for myself..
I've always thought it was nearly implausible to be ''all-in-one''...
...but how can that be? I saw living proof of it...
I couldn't help but feel a bit envious.
Inferiority complex, much?
Ms. Belle
Egocentrism
"I can't believe I did what I did.
I just can't digest the entity I've become.
I don't understand what happened nor what occured to me in that instant;
All I know is that I did it.
I hurt her.
But it wasn't me.
Although technically, it was.
It was my body, my hands, my legs, my apathetic face.
But someone else domained and controlled my mind.
Someone whose name wasn't even mine.
Was it me?
Or was it a stranger?
How can I be me yet also be that ''Amy'' at the same time?
It was a dream.
It must have been."
Life is a dream played in your own little head.
P.S: I aced my presentation! :D AND I gained weight!
Celebrity Clone
To whom it may concern,
do you know who I am?
My name is Dolly, The Sheep. And I am a celebrity.
If you don't know who I am, it's fine, I guess.
It doesn't matter anymore, anyway. There are many like me these days, so it's not like I'm irreplaceable.
... although on second thought, you should know me...
after all, I symbolize a vital step in development ... at least, that's what people say.
I was born on the 5th of July, 1996 to my mom and dad.
But to tell you the truth, I sense that there's something wrong... and just between you and me, I have this feeling my dad had an affair before I was born: I don't look like my "mom" at all! I look like this other woman who everyone mistakes me with.
It's quite peculiar, actually, and terribly vexing, but I guess I learned to get used to it.
Ever since I was born, I've already been famous.
I don't even have a clue why, but that's that... and that's a fact.
... And if there's one thing I can recall from my past then it's the huge crowds lining up to see me; always taking polaroids of me and always smiling or gasping in evident astonishment.
I mean what the hell?
I always deemed them crazy.
Oh, well. At least I'm famous.
Anyway, my life has been pretty much like that every single day.
I have never seen much of the world, for others held me captive and indoors most of the time.
I always felt neglected for some reason, because when I looked at the other sheep, they were allowed to do thousands of things I couldn't even dream about.
I have a life, but I feel dead.
Now, however, it's really coming to an end; the puppeteer pulling the strings has decided to finally cut mine.
I'm nearing my 6th birthday, and I've been told I'll die young -- due to severe arthritis and some lung disease whose name one doesn't even mention.
I guess I don't have anything against it; for my life, though known and loved, has been pretty agonizing these past few years, anyway.
Now, I'll have to face my imminent death which I'll do with gladness.
-- and yet, I still have this nagging gut feeling of mine regarding my dad's probable affair...
But still, this is it.
My last letter prior my death.
-- and I just wanted to let you know that, whatever my purpose in this life may have been, I hope no other sheep will end like me.
Yours truly,
Dolly The Sheep
It's 11:35pm here in Berlin and my head is still full of thoughts on cloning. Why? Due to the MSA ('Mittlerer Schulabschluss') presentation I still have to research for but which I have been procrastinating these few months.
My group's topic is animal cloning, and to be more specific: 'Dolly, The Sheep' and its impact on scientific developments and progressions -- and to tell you the truth, this is the first time I've gotten to know and read about the complicated procedure that is cloning.
What most people think of when they hear of 'clones' is the typical science fictional mentality sexy Scarlet Johanson showed us in the movie 'THE ISLAND'.
The fact is, though, that cloning can occur on a daily basis quite naturally as well : e.g the process which produces identical twins or also vegetative propagation (cutting a leaf of a plant and letting it grow into a new one).
So what's so controversial about it?
Cloning can be done naturally and artificially -- and as always, the artificial procedure is what everyone's making a big fuss about.
Do you know what they do?
Well, I'll explain you how cloning Dolly worked in simple words:
1) They took a specialized cell's nucleus from a specific animal.
2) They took an egg from another animal from the same species, but destroyed its nucleus as to ruin the genetic information it contained (it then becomes enucleated) .
3) A fusion of the nucleus and enucleated egg took place with help of electricity.
4) They then implanted this into Dolly's mom.
5) There goes Dolly.
To tell you the truth, I was absolutely flabbergasted once I read this procedure due to the advancement our technology undergoes continuously and the things it enables us to do.
It even lets us play God -- or act like Superman and save species and mankind.
Either way, I still have a very vague idea of how to evaluate this whole thing in an ethical point of view.
--- And the only thing I know is that I'm sleepy and I need my beauty sleep -- AND that I'm ardently eager to know what you guys think.
Wish me luck in dreamland!
Lo extraño
Hace mucho que ya no hablo en esta idioma.
Espero que yo no lo vaya a olvidar...
... y disculpadme si lo que estoy escribiendo esta un poco mal. Jaja! (Espero que no!)
Bueno, a lo mejor intentaré escribir algo en castellano los proximas dias.
Estoy haciendo una presentación para mi MSA; se trata de clonación de los animales.
Me duele la cabeza de tanto pensar. Ni me puedo concentrar!
Hasta aqui, espero que tambien os enamoreis en esta canción ,eh!
Me hace recordar tantas cosas... y por lo menos ya no siento el dolor.
P.S: Jolín, tengo que leer mas libros en Español para que mi Español no se empeore aún mas!
The child
I feel so suffocated.
Temptation
Temptation.
I'm waiting for something that won't even happen;
something I shouldn't even be pining for;
A danger and admonition.
My heart thirsts in its restlessness, although on the other hand,hesitates;
my mind, devoid of sensibility and my body, impulsive.
The house is crumbling down as the bricks begin to break.
Oh, what have I done? Heart, treacherous snake!
One sweet glance suffices,or all should I keep?
a forbidden stare or carnal passion; desire against desire?
Mind, come back! Quench these tenacious dreams!
Reality. Imagination? Either way, my heart's tearing at it seams.
A moNster, apathetic; what have I become?
Oh, temptation; illusion!
Inhuman act of sin!
Drama day. God, I need a break!
Renee
Unknown Artist
Boredom strikes back
Boredom's back...
... and this time, it struck very hard.
It's holidays in Berlin, and I'm extremely bored because almost everyone left Berlin for a week.
Normally, I'd write some kind of short story or something like that, but I decided to be a bit of a narcissist today ... so bear with this -- or just don't read it at all. :))
What is the sexiest part of the opposite sex's body?
- the eyes and mouth.... or actually, his maturity.. but that's not part of the body, is it?
Have you ever made up/sang a song for someone you cared about?
- not a song; I'm not good at music. Haha! But a poem.
Is there a baby in the room with you right now?
- nope. Or I could consider myself a baby, in this case. haha!
Do you know how to dance?
- I'm not sure. I like dancing, but I don't know whether I can.
Where do you sing the most, in the car, the shower or elsewhere?
- At school during class while we are asked to do some assignment.
What is your favorite thing that is green?
- leaves of a tree?!
What did your last text message say?
- "I miss you. Come back" Cheesy, much?
Boxers, briefs or boxer briefs?
- BOXERS!
What is your middle name?
- Chan.
What is the way to your heart?
- Open-mindedness, maturity and the way I can talk to someone easily. HAHA.
What do you smell like?
- Nutella
Whats in your pocket?
- I have no pocket.
Anything in your mouth?
- My temporary braces.
Ever hurt yourself playing Wii?
- What'S that?
Do you have freckles?
- nope.
How many languages can you say "Hello" in?
- 20. haha! Thank youuuuuuu, international school!
Whats the last movie you saw in the theater?
- movie and theater? Don't you mean play? Or cinema? huh!?
Ever jumped/fallen/been pushed in a pool with your clothes on?
- Ooooooooooh yes. That was fun.
Are you wearing any clothes that you wore yesterday?
- Uhmmm... no comment. HAHA!
- "I see you" - Leona Lewis. I think I watched "Avatar" waaay too often.
Are you in love with someone right now?
- Everyone is.
Whats the last thing you watched on TV?
- Harry Potter and The Order Of The Phoenix. Hahaha!
Whats the last video game you played?
- Nice question. Who knows? :P
Who is your daddy and what does he do?
- My daddy's THE MAN! :)) Hahaha!
Can you do the alphabet in sign language?
- I used to.
Do you have an ankle named Joe?
- Haha that's totally random.
What word do you use when people pass gas?
- First, I laugh and then say: "Whoooops!"
Do you wear glasses?
- Yup, I lost my contact lenses.
What can you hear right now?
- The ticking of the clock... it's kind of creepy.
Did you feel better or worse or the same yesterday?
- Worse.
Ever been overseas?
- I am overseas right now. Haha!
What are your plans for today?
- Meet up with a friend and then go to church :P
How long have you had MySpace?
- Not long. I deleted it about a year after.
What was your favorite childhood show?
- TOO MANY TO MENTION. HAHA. Teletubbies?
Are you close to your siblings?
- Yup, very!
Do you like your feet?
- NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
The Blue Balloon
The string strung along with the course of time; the blue balloon; nearing its loss.An apathetic adult, lost in the world.
"Rearranged"
Renée
All so instantaneous;
his life's been rearranged.
This isn't just a renovation,
the furniture's been moved.
The floor smells like varnish;
The wallpaper new.
Not only is one room unfamiliar,
the whole house is now a stranger.
This is supposed to be his home,
where he feels safe,
no danger.
Instead, he feels abandoned in some foreign land.
With nowhere to go to, nor any permanent shelter.
The door's been recently painted,
the windows recarved.
the ceiling seems to be an unknown sky
he's never seen before.
He wants to help himself,
be shown some direction;
but he's simply standing in this place,
which once used to be his haven.
He's staring at the walls,
observing how they change,
with every second he spends on his search.
his long search for some answers.
And while he sees his surroundings switch,
from red to gray;
from gray to green;
he himself becomes different.
No longer knowing the person he's always been.
So who's this boy there,
whose identity is now lost?
Not finding that joyful place
that he had always sought?
Here we go again.
As a diplomat's child, I've practically been moving my whole life: the first time being when I was merely three years old. During that time, my mom got a post in Madrid, where I then spent the following six/seven years of my childhood. It was quite enjoyable for me, being a quirky, happy-go-lucky person who easily got excited by the tiniest details.
That was years ago, when I was still insouciant and nonchalant --
... yet I'm sixteen now -- and that changes several things.
About five months ago, I had to move from Hamburg to Berlin due to some unexpected inconvenience from the government. Never mind that, it seemed quite ok for me at first. I thought: new city, new people, new school, new experiences, A FRESH NEW START. What can be more appealing, right? (Ok, so I also felt a tinge of regret for not being able to be with my friends that often and all that, but Hamburg is only 300kms away from the capital, which means I can come visit them often... and vice versa - which would be even more awesome!)
I've been becoming a Facebook addict these last few months, and I tend to visit profiles of people I know here to "analyze" their personality with just observing how they write and stuff like that (my intuition when it comes to "categorizing" people's personalities and types has always been suprisingly accurate), and when I see the smiles they share with friends who are right next to them, I can't help but feel a bit too envious.
I wouldn't say I'm a loner : I go out with people and have a social life; but I just can't seem to satisfy myself with just "hanging out" with people without having someone who I can really talk to, someone who also listens attentively to what I've got to say.
The thing is, in whatever I've gotten myself into, they'll accept you if you're just like them.
If you're different, or even have a slight deviation in interest, they'll deem you someone they would never get along with.
I mean: what's that all about?
Sometimes, I wonder whether it's, in the end, all my fault; whether I'm too "quiet" and don't take any initiative to get to know them at all, but then I recall the numerous times I've attempted to approach people.
I've approached time and again, but get refuted just as much.
What's frustrating is, actually, that the people with whom I can truly be myself without any hesitation aren't even in my class nor school, so I barely have any common activities with them. Apart from that, they also are often busy with their extracurricular activities. So what am I to do?
I'm always being myself - and I freaking won't CHANGE MYSELF just for THIS CRAP.
... but WHY does the society just ostracize books with different covers?
I don't get it - and I think I'll never will.
I've devised my own theory of why that could be.
This is how it goes:
my old school used to be a very multicultural one (there was this special department which children from around the globe attended in order to learn German from scratch), whereas my current one isn't as much.
Although the pupils do have diverse ethnical backgrounds, the culture they were brought up in is still a very Western one.
-- and we all know that there is variety in warmth towards foreigners/strangers depending on the culture:
for example, in Asia, the treatment of what is alien is warmer than, let's say, here in Europe ... because here in Europe, everyone is straight to the point and rather... independent? while in the East, there always is this sense of familiarity wherever you may go.
Maybe I'm wrong, but that's the only thing that restrains my patience from snapping.
Oh, and please don't think I'm mental.
I'm not - really.
I'm just a frustrated girl who wants to learn the most of the world.
And someone who just can't understand how her generation seems to be developing in such an intolerant way.
Damn that TV.
Damn those radios.
Guys, any ADVISE?!
Renée M.
P.S: NO MAN IS AN ISLAND.
The Wall (ending)
“...but I believe your grandparents have been in a car accident last night en route to Florida... and... passed away...”, the policeman added shyly, evidently not comfortable with the fact that he was the one who had to tell a young, growing girl that her godparents were gone.
“We found this in the car and were able to identify their bodies and also found your address...”, he finished, handing Melody what she recalled as Anne's wallet. She couldn't believe her ears; she couldn't conceive that all of this was happening all over again before her very eyes, a dèjà vu...
Her mind remained blank due to the aftershock as the policeman turned around to leave after having explained the procedures she would have to go through the day after tomorrow.
She refused to accept the reality yet the increasing pain she felt was more than proof that this wasn't just a bad dream. Every second and minute that passed by seemed to merely be torture for her, she needed shelter, an escape; a solace from the cruel reality that she badly denied. Before she knew it, Melody was already making her way to her “secret spot”, shambling and trembling along the way.
As she arrived, the picture-perfect view disappeared although everything was still where it was supposed to be: the trees, the road, the flowers, the chirping... the only exception was the sky: it was gray and dull; full of big, dark clouds, this time overcasting not only the sun, but the clear, blue sky as well.
So many emotions started boiling up inside her simultaneously, getting flustered and overwhelmed. She felt shocked: shocked because she was once again in the same situation that she had been years ago; shocked due to the thought that she would never see her godparents ever again; that yesterday was the last time she would ever see Anne smile that smile or eat the infallible breakfast that she had always prepared for Melody with care. She felt contrite and regretful: regret for her having disrespected Anne these past several years or her disregarding of her godmother's benign and effort to take care of her, the love that she had always tried to show her... simply repentant of all the transgressions she had done against her loving godparents. She felt frustrated and disappointed: frustrated by the inept behavior she had had towards them, disappointed of herself, for letting herself behave in such an egotistical manner...
She continued reflecting on herself, thinking of all the countless wrongs she had committed and pondering on what she could now do to amend them... “But it's too late to apologize...”, she told herself, tears swelling up in her eyes as she gave her best to fight against them. And indeed it was.
“...but I guess it still isn't too late to give it another shot; to start anew...”, she concluded.
She now could see things from the clearest point of view: ever since her parents had passed away, she had not been able to appreciate all of the things she had still had: the fact that she had enough to live; a home, food to nourish herself, loving and caring guardians and the opportunity to study was inconsequential to her, for everything she had wanted and thought of was having her parents back; to bring back the life she had had with them, not wanting to accept the reality. She now understood what separated her, like a wall, from the happiness she had craved for all along: it wasn't the “lack of love” from her godparents nor the situation she had been in...it was simply the ingratitude she had had; the ingratitude of all the opportunities and things she was still able to experience; that she still had, her eyes blinded by the loss of the two people she had loved most.
After all of her brooding, Melody Carmen decided that come what may, she would try and make a change; to make a change and to value everything she had before it would be taken away...
”...for nothing in life is permanent and could be stolen from you faster than a heartbeat.”, she murmured to herself, smiling, as she turned her gaze towards the blue sky and noticed that the sun came out, not a single cloud marring its light and warmth: picture-perfect.
The Wall (part 2)
“...Whoopee, another Monday morning...”, Melody exclaimed to herself, sarcasm hidden behind her voice, sighing to the monotony of her daily routine as she reached for the ringing alarm clock which had woken her up. She unwillingly got out of bed and stood on both her feet, wobbling from side to side due to the haziness caused by sleep deprivation. She took a long glimpse outside the window, perceiving a dull and dismal sight as many gray clouds obscured the sun, not letting any sunlight through. For some reason, Melody then felt a spasm of uneasiness, as though something unexpected was bound to happen that would have a very strong impact on her way of living; the end of her seemingly never-ending search for answers. After packing her schoolbag, she hurried herself up to leave the house, not noticing the neatly folded letter situated beside the telephone...
The day progressed just like any ordinary school day for Melody: her arrival at school was just in time, and as usual, she took a seat in the second row, put out her notebooks for each respective subject and did her best not to cope up with her teachers' demands, questions and explanations for she considered all of these as endless prattling. Instead, all she did was to scribble nonsense on her already drawn notebook, once again lost in her own thoughts...
Finally, the bell rang, signaling dismissal. Melody didn't wait a moment longer to stay at school and immediately made her way home, wishing for some rest on her cozy, soft bed, her eyes flickering briefly towards the gray clouds that still overcast the sun.
“Anne, I'm home!”, she droned in a raucous manner, something that was part of her daily routine upon arriving. Yet oddly enough, there came no answer. So where WERE they? “They are always at home by this time...”, Melody wondered to herself, pangs of worries starting to surface which she, however, attempted to oppress as she mostly showed apathy towards her godparents, when she suddenly spotted a tidily kept piece of paper next to the old-fashioned telephone that she rarely used. Upon unfolding it, she instantly recognized her godmother's penmanship.
“Melody, dear, your godfather and I went to Florida for a day or two due to this occasion that we have to attend to. We wanted to remind you about it this morning as we ate breakfast, but you once again had to make a scene and left before we could say a word. There's enough food in the fridge. We love you,
Anne”
“Oh, yeah, NOW I remember... They did mention that a few days ago...”, she exclaimed, sighing in relief, a huge weight somehow lifted off of her chest. The next few hours were then spent by writing in her journal; her pages her only release, while listening to music which calmed and soothed her. Just as Melody was about to pour out her feelings on a new, blank page, the doorbell rang.
“May I help you?”, Melody asked upon opening the door and seeing a well-groomed policeman.
“Good afternoon, miss, are you Melody Carmen De la Cruz?”, he replied to her question, taking a small peek in a folder which he held in his hands.
“Yes, I am.”, she responded tersely.
“And are... Anne and William Santos your godparents?”
Melody nodded once, as to show acquiescence, her heart somehow heavy, beating extremely loudly and faster with every passing second.
“I'm so sorry to tell you this...” Upon hearing these words, Melody's heart skipped a beat.
The Wall (part 1)
This was actually also some kind of homework I wrote about a year ago. The theme was supposed to be "wall", so I decided to write a story on an abstract kind of wall.
This is it.
I hope you like it.
- and I'd love to read any comments.
By the way, I divided it into three parts so that you can read it a bit more easily. :P
“…Oh, yet another Sunday morning…,” Melody Carmen thought to herself, indifferent, as she woke up to the sound of the chirping birds outside. She slowly rubbed her eyes with both her hands while making her way towards the window, reaching out to the black and white polka-dotted curtains and pulling them apart, letting the sunlight permeate the whole room. After having done so, she turned around and faced her room, seeing how chaotic and untidy it was: dirty socks were lying everywhere, books stacked precariously on her more than stuffed shelf while all of her yet-to-be-done homework lay on the floor. She closed her deep, blue eyes, sore from all of the crying she had done the night before, and felt the sunrays’ warmth tingling on her sensitive, pale skin. As always, several thoughts started lingering in her mind.
“Melody! Come down and eat!” a shrill, familiar voice suddenly called out; waking the 16-year-old teenager from her profound trance who then, after having changed clothes, hastily ran downstairs, not wanting to make her godmother wait, trying to avoid getting shouted at once again.
Upon arriving the brightly lit dining room, she quickly took a seat at the dining table where a typical American breakfast, bacons and toast, awaited her.
“So… did you sleep well, Melody?”
“Yeah”, the teenager lied, knowing very well that she had barely had any sleep, as always, due to all of the worries that she had entertained in her mind last night and due to all of her crying. Ever since her parents had passed away in an airplane crash long ago, Melody rarely told the truth to anyone, especially to her godparents, adamantly thinking that they were merely trying to replace her parents’ place in her heart by being hypocritical and pretentious. Little did she know, though, was that this dubious way of thinking was what had eventually molded her into the introverted and mistrusting person that she was, thus making it hard for her to find good friends.
“Glad to hear that”, exclaimed her godmother, Anne , warmly and smiling. Although a heartfelt smile was spread across her tired-looking face, Melody could sense an undercurrent of sorrow.
“Is there something wrong?,” she asked herself, chewing on the juicy piece of fried bacon, hitting the empty spot in her stomach. Regardless of her growing curiosity, the young adolescent decided not to ask anything, concluding that whatever it might be, it was Anne's problem and not hers, in addition to not wanting to get herself involved into other people's business. Right after eating, she abruptly stood up, left the dirty dishes at the sink and began to saunter towards the house's front door and to make her way to the appointment she had set with a friend of hers; her only “good” friend, blinded by the fact that he, however, didn't have any good influence on her, not even bothering to don the coat which was hanging, untouched, on the recently polished coat rack.
“Melody!! Wait a moment! What do you think you're doing? Where are you going? Don't tell me you're going to that friend of yours again! How many times have we told you that he's no good influence for you, Melody! And besides... we made an agreement, remember? You're supposed to wash the dishes today,” Anne suddenly exclaimed with a soft yet firm voice, surprising the teenager who was about to turn the doorknob and who then obstinately disregarded her godmother's demand, slamming the front door behind her with such a force that made the house shake as a result.
“Who are you to tell me what to do?! You're not the boss of me!” The teenager, angered by her godmother's command, retorted balefully as she stood at the house's front porch which was surrounded by several colorful, blooming flowers, a sign that showed that Spring, the beginning of time, had just started. She made her way to her secret spot, the place she normally went to whenever she needed some “alone time”, some distance from other people and some isolation, all of which she longed for more often than it should be, ever since the people she had cherished most, her parents, had had to meet their demise. Upon arriving, she took in the perfect and picturesque view of nature which, however, always seemed to be lacking something. Yet the question was: what?
The green trees at the entrance of the thick forest still glowered at her precariously; the winding road that lead to the depth of the forest as uncertain as ever, the birds' morning song resonated in the background in a cheerful manner; its echo reverberating in the emptiness which had, bit by bit, filled Melody's melancholic heart in the past years, the clear blue sky above offered her some peace of mind and a clear sight of things; albeit to some gray clouds that seemed to be hovering around, and the already-blossoming flowers, radiant as ever, demonstrating that every end was merely the start of a new beginning. Simply picture-perfect. So what was missing? Everything seemed to be there, but Melody always had the impression that it didn't seem to be complete... Maybe it was the lacking sunlight ,overcast by a gigantic, dark cloud?
Or maybe the absence of source of warmth; warmth to the coldness that crept upon her skin?...
Engrossed by her daydream, the teenager had eventually lost track of time and had even forgotten about the arrangement to meet her friend as she quietly observed the sun set slowly, the darkness becoming omnipresent and the temperature falling.
It was around midnight when Melody finally figured it was time to go home... Home? Where was that? “No, I've lost my place called “home” a long time ago... It's time to go to Anne's”, she thought, reluctantly standing up and setting off for her godparents' house.
On her way there, she gazed at the blazingly twinkling stars above her head, deliberately brooding over the unknown cause of the sudden turn of personality and mindset she had experienced, still not finding any answer to the posed question.
“I'm home!”, she shouted once arriving, her yell piercing into the unusual silence that had reigned. No reply. Where were they?
“I'M HOME!”, she repeated, this time more loudly. Yet to no avail: still no respond. She decided to go upstairs and check in their bedroom, when all of a sudden, a thought hit her. “Maybe they're asleep... after all, it's already late”, she concluded, not bothering to verify whether her godparents were there or not. She then made her way to her room, rashly donned her PJ's and directly went to bed, closing her eyes and after several minutes, finally drifting into a dreamless sleep...
A story I wrote in the 7th grade
Promenade
By Renée M.
BUS NUMBER 94 arrived in The Lake District at 10
am sharp. It had been a long, tiring and arduous
journey, so Greg and Tony were extremely tired
when they arrived there. These two college brothers
loved to go walking, so they had decided to go to the
most recommended place for exciting walks: the Lake
District.
“Wow!! I’m glad we decided to go here. It’s such a
beautiful place! Where do we go first? How about
there? All my classmates keep on bragging about
having been there, you know,” exclaimed Greg, forgetting
that they were there to go walking, while taking
in his beautiful surroundings. Tony, being the older one,
was much less enthusiastic.
“Wait. Don’t be your careless self. We’re not here to go sightseeing.
Don’t forget, we’re here to go walking! WAL-KING,” he
replied, stressing the last word.
“Oh yeah, we are…Sorry. But…we still have enough time to go somewhere
and then go walking, haven’t we? Besides, we’re going to go walking tomo--” Tony, who just
looked at his watch, interrupted his brother:
“Ermm…Yeah, I guess so. Come on, let’s go!” The two brothers then went to the place that Greg had mentioned
earlier. They were really enjoying themselves and they didn’t regret going to the Lake District. A few
hours passed by. It was 2pm. Just then, Greg realized something.
“Oh no. We forgot to look for a hotel where we can sleep in,” he stated matter-of-factly.
“Oh shoot…Now we won’t be able to---wait. A HOTEL? Are you mad? We don’t have enough money for that!”
his brother Tony said, annoyed. Greg shrugged.
“I know. Chill out. I just said that to annoy you…But I’m not joking. We don’t have any place where we could
stay for the weekend and we didn’t bring much money with us…We just have like…500 or so...”
“Hmm…What about a bed and breakfast place?” Tony suggested.
“That’s a good idea…Let’s ask someone if there’s a bed and breakfast place nearby.”
Both of them started asking
people who were passing by if they knew of one nearby. The people who they asked hadn’t really cooperated
and just continued to walk and didn’t even answer their question. After several tries, a strange-looking
adult told them that the nearest and cheapest bed and breakfast was about 5 km away. The two boys thanked
him and followed the man’s directions.
They took the bus and after 10 precious minutes, they finally arrived at
a bed and breakfast place with a big sign on the front door that read: “Bed & Breakfast: Hill view”.
The place
was nice: the view outside was calming and it looked quite comfortable to sleep in. The door was wooden and
one could notice that it was recently polished, because it was shining brightly, just like the sun. The roof was
red, and the building was made of wood. It was like a small hut.
“Wow. I think…I like this place,” Greg said.
“Yeah. It actually reminds me of our uncle’s dojo in Japan, don’t you think?” Tony didn’t wait for Greg’s answer.
“Let’s go inside.”
Both of them entered the wooden building. Upon entering, they saw a small couch and
a fireplace on their left. On their right side, they saw the reception. An old woman was sitting behind the
counter, smiling. In front of them, there were wooden stairs, which looked creaky and old and they looked as if
when you stepped on them, they would just give away and crack. There were a lot of decorations: some of them
were abstract paintings, some of them were animal horns and some of them were simply maps.
“Not bad,” exclaimed Tony. They didn’t hesitate to go to the receptionist: they both wanted to sleep here as it
looked like a very comfortable place.
“Good day. I’m Greg and this is Tony, my brother. Do you have a double room?” Greg asked the old woman.
“Good day. I’m Mrs. Johnston. Yes, luckily we do have a room with two beds. Do you want to take the new special
offer or just B&B? The new special offer’s B&B plus dinner. It’s from £22 and above a night,” the old,
charming woman said.
“Whoa. That’s kind of expensive…” Tony exclaimed, surprised by the price. The old woman simply smiled
nicely.
“Hey Tony, let’s just stay here. I don’t want to look for another B&B. My feet hurt!! Besides, we still have
500…” Greg complained to his older, more mature and responsible brother. Tony just nodded his head in acquiescence.
“Ok…We’d like to take that room, the one with two beds in it,” he said to the woman.
She then gave them the keys to their rooms. “Oh…and one more thing. You always have to tell me if you are
going out walking. If I’m not here at the counter by the time you’re going out, just write a letter and leave it
here with your signatures…you know, for security reasons…” she added. The two brothers nodded, took the keys and quickly went to their room. It was a very comfortable room: there were two soft beds, each with a
fluffy white pillow. On top of each bed was a thick, striped blanket, to keep you warm at night. Both brothers,
being very tired, just stared at the beds in awe, hastily changed their clothes and lay in bed the whole day until
they finally fell asleep.
“Greg! GREG!” Tony was waking his younger brother up, as it was already 8am and last night, they both had
decided to leave for their walk at 9. Tony shook his brother’s shoulders. Greg opened his eyes and saw his sibling’s
face and could hear the radio in the background. He felt annoyed.
“WHAT THE HECK’S WRONG WITH YOU? CAN’T YOU SEE I’M TRYING TO SLEEP?”
“Don’t talk to me like that! Fine, then go to sleep! I’m going walking. It’s already 8:02, you know? I already took
a shower and I’m already prepared…well…almost... Anyway, we went all the way here to GO walking, not to
lie down in bed and be a lazybones! We could’ve done that in Manchester!” Tony shouted.
“It’s 8 already? Why didn’t you say so?” Greg suddenly jumped out of bed, took a 5-minute shower, combed his
untidy hair, put on his shoes and said: “Ready!”
“You dummy. What about our stuff?” Tony stated, annoyed by his younger brother’s ignorance and carelessness.
He then started packing up the things that he needed for the walk: a compass, a flashlight, a whistle, waterproofs,
packed lunch, a medicine kit, a warm pullover, a big bottle of water, a huge plastic bag and some extra
food. Greg, upon seeing what his brother was doing, started to do the same and packed the same stuff in his
own rucksack. Just then the radio reporter reported the weather update.
“Hello folks. Today is Saturday, the 10th of November, and the weather will be warm and sunny, 20°, quite
high in this time of the year. The temperature will drop to 4° in the evening and there will be some rain here
and there. For the hill walkers, the weather changes quite rapidly in the mountains, so I suggest you guys to
bring pullovers, too. That was the weather report, 8:05 am.” Both of them listened to the reporter carefully, for they needed to know if the weather today was suitable for a nice, long walk. Greg glanced at the small night table and saw a manual. He took it and started to read it out loud:
“….distress signal is six long whistle blasts or torch flashes, repeated after one minute…”
“WOW. For once in your life, you did something right. If you hadn’t seen that little manual of yours, we
wouldn’t have known the distress signal…” Tony said, with a small smirk on his face. Greg didn’t react to his
snide little comment, but instead, he just kept on reading the manual, but this time, quietly. Tony broke the silence
between them after a few minutes.
“We’re ready…Let’s go.”
“WAIT! Don’t forget, we have to tell Mrs. Johnston that we will go walking today!” Greg reminded his sibling.
“Ok, after eating, we will drop by the reception and tell her.” Both teenagers took their rucksacks and wore
them, opened the room’s wooden door and went to the dining room. They took a plate and put food on it: bacon,
eggs, toast… After eating their breakfast, they went to the reception and saw that Mrs Johnston wasn’t there
and waited for a while. After several minutes, Tony looked at his watch.
“It’s 8:50. We’ve got to go. Let’s just write a letter and leave it here.” Greg took a piece of paper and a pen and
wrote:
We’re going to climb the Old Man of Caniston today. We’ll be back at 6 pm for our dinner.
Yours,
Greg+Tony
He reread his letter. Satisfied, he gave it to his older brother and he put it on the counter, right under a pink
pen holder.
“Ok, everything’s settled. Let’s go now.” Tony exclaimed with an impatient voice. They went out of the wooden
building and looked at their surroundings: it was stunning. The sun was shining brightly above them; the
streams were flowing gracefully like a swan towards the blue, clean rivers; you could feel the cleansed, refreshing
air reaching your lungs every time you breathed; the mountains looked quite peaceful but treacherous and
dangerous at the same time; you could hear the birds singing their morning song…The place was simply beautiful…
beautiful and breathtaking.
“Wow. I wasn’t able to appreciate this place last night because I was too tired…But now…WOW.” Greg stated,
still staring at their surroundings in awe. Tony didn’t say anything: he just kept on staring at nature’s divine
beauty, obviously amazed. After several minutes of staring, they started to walk towards the wilderness…They
wandered and wandered and wandered for what felt like an eternity but was in reality only an hour.
“Wow. I’m glad we went here. This place is AMAZING!!” Tony exclaimed, still astounded by their beautiful surroundings.
“Yeah, me too…let’s take a 5-minute break.” Greg suggested.
“Fine.” Both men looked for a rock where they could sit on. After sitting, Greg opened his rucksack, took a
chicken sandwich and took a bite.
“Wow. You get hungry so fast.” Tony teased and drank a bit of water. 5 minutes passed by and they were already
on their way to the Old Caniston’s top.
Every step they took, everywhere they looked, it was nature’s divine
grace: tall, big, green oak trees protected them from the sun’s warm rays; the clear rivers full of fish swimming
gleefully; the warm, strong wind caressing their faces, making a drop of sweat fall down from their already
sweating foreheads; the colorful leaves, being autumn, were slowly falling from the branches and reaching
the ground…
Mrs Johnston arrived at the bed and breakfast place at about 10 am: she had gone shopping. As she arrived,
she immediately saw Greg’s and Tony’s letter under her favourite pink penholder. She took it, and after reading
it, threw it in the trash can. Mrs Johnston lived a normal life: she was neither rich nor poor. She could buy
all the important things that one needs to live and also the bed and breakfast place’s necessities. She looked
around: people were eating their breakfast. Since long before, her bed and breakfast place, being the cheapest
in the area, had already been the most popular one in the Lake District. She was proud of her accomplishments…
but something had always been missing in her life: a family. A family to nurture. A family to
love…Mrs Johnston went behind the counter, took a magazine, and waited for customers to serve to and the
two brothers: Greg and Tony.
Several hours passed by. It was 3:00 pm.
“Tony, isn’t that the weird rock that we saw an hour ago?” Greg asked his brother.
“Yeah, it is! Ughh, just take out the map. We’ve been wandering all these hours and we’re not even an INCH
closer to the Old Man’s top!” Tony ordered impatiently.
“Hey, don’t look at me. It’s not my fault we’re lost. You’re the navigator…Ma—map? Don’t YOU have the map?”
Greg replied, afraid of what his brother was about to answer.
“WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? You have the map! I—didn’t you bring it? I thought you
brought it…I don’t have it!!” his brother shouted.
“Great. Just…great. We’re lost, we’re hungry and we didn’t even reach the Man’s top!! We don’t even have any
food left!! Greg yelled hysterically.
“OK…it’s best if we stay calm…Let’s just…Umm…Let’s check the compass.” Tony tried to calm his brother
down. He then took the compass out of his big rucksack and tried to find where they were.
“What’s wrong with this? The handle doesn’t even move! This is---crap. Trash. It’s broken. Greg, give me
yours.” His younger brother didn’t wait a minute longer: he immediately gave his compass to Tony.
“Oh shoot. Don’t tell me YOURS is broken TOO!” Tony exclaimed, after having tried to fix both compasses.
“How are we supposed to find our way to the top or our way home if we don’t even have a map nor a compass?”
Greg asked.
“I don’t know. Let’s just…trust our instincts, I guess…” Tony replied, unsure of what to do…
Minutes passed by…and then an hour…and then 2 hours… It was 7:50 pm and Mrs. Johnston was getting a
little worried about the two brothers. She was still waiting behind the counter, glancing at the door every time
someone entered. She had wanted to call the Mountain Rescue team when it was 7 pm, but she had hesitated
and instead, she had waited a bit longer. But now, she couldn’t take it any more. The grandfather’s clock
chimed: it was already 8 pm. She took the phone receiver and dialled 999.
“Good evening. Which service would you like to speak to?” the woman who answered asked politely.
“Hello. This is Mrs Johnston. I would like to speak to the Mountain Rescue team, please,” Mrs Johnston said.
“One moment.” After a few seconds, a man’s voice spoke.
“Hello. This is the Mountain Rescue team. How may I help you?”
“Hello. This is Mrs Johnston, the owner of the bed and breakfast place called Hill View. I have these two customers
who haven’t come back from their walk yet…and it’s getting dark…” Mrs Johnston said with a worried
tone.
“Hmm…and at what time did they leave?” the man asked.
“Well, I don’t know for sure, because I was shopping when they left. But in the letter that they wrote to me, it
said that it was 8:52… so I guess they left at about 9 am. They also wrote that they were going to be back at
about 6 pm for their supper…”
“I understand… We will wait for another hour and see if they come back by 9. If not, then we will send out the
Rescue team, ok?” the man said.
“Ok…” Mrs Johnston replied in acquiescence and hung up the phone, thinking of what the two boys were doing
right now…
“Look, we’re not getting anywhere! Let’s not ‘follow our instincts’ anymore! That’s crap! If we keep on following
them, we won’t be getting anywhere. Let’s just wait here until someone passes by and then they can help us!” a tall, slim figure suggested to the taller and bigger figure right next to him.
“I’ve told you, no one will pass by, because we’re waaaay too far from civilization!!” this figure, named Tony replied, annoyed.
“I know. But it’s dark. We weren’t able to find our way home when it still wasn’t dark, but now that it is, our
chances are NEXT TO NONE!!” Greg pointed out loudly.
Suddenly, something moved hastily and briskly in the thick, green bushes right behind them…
It was 10 o’clock in the evening and every one was already at home, sitting behind their fireplaces or already
going to sleep.
“This is Peter Wellington with the 10pm news. Today, two young college boys from Manchester, aged 19 and
20, got lost on their way to the mountains. The mountain rescue team is now looking for them. This is the
fourth time this month that the team had to look for someone in the dark. 50-year-old Mrs Johnston informed
us of their disappearance a few hours ago. This is Peter Wellington with the---“ Mrs Johnston took the TV’s remote
and turned it off. She had been anxiously waiting for the two boys to come back. The mountain rescue
team had started their search at 9 pm, and up to now they hadn’t found anything. Mrs Johnston just kept on
staring outside the window, waiting and waiting…waiting for something to happen…
“Mountain Rescue team 1 to mountain rescue team 2. Have you found anything? Over.” The two teams that
were assigned to look for the two boys were outside in the cold, windy wilderness. Something fell on top of
Dave’s head. He looked at the sky: it was starting to rain. Drops of rain fell, one after the other. The man took
his walkman and tried to listen to what his colleague said.
“Mountain Rescue team 2 to Mountain Rescue team 1. Dave, we haven’t found a single thing... and it’s starting
to rain. What do we do? Over.”
“I don’t really know. But I think it’s best if we go back and then we can start our search again before sunset.
Let’s meet in the car park at 6 am. Besides, even if the two lads had a whistle, we wouldn’t be able to hear a
single thing with this blasted wind!!” the other man replied.
“So it’s settled then. Let’s go back. And then let’s meet in the car park at 6 am. Over and out.” Both men were
making their way back to the bed and breakfast place, giving up their search, not knowing where the brothers
were…
Two figures were running in the woods, trying to get away from a larger figure behind them.
“RUN, GREG, RUN!!” the figure ahead shouted on top of his lungs, panting.
“Oh damn! Who’d have thought there are bears in the Lake District?” the second figure, named Greg, exclaimed.
He looked behind him: the bear was still there, chasing them and roaring ferociously at the same
time. It was still raining and on top of that, the wind was getting stronger and stronger… The weather was
getting even worse. Something roared: it was lightning.
“Ohh great!! This is the BEST walk ever! A bear is chasing us, thinking that we’re his dinner and it’s raining
so hard that we’re going to catch pneumonia!! ” Tony said, still running for his life. Suddenly, a branch caught
Greg’s foot and made him stumble. He shouted in pain: he twisted his ankle. The bear wasn’t that far away... It was getting closer…and closer… Tony tried to help his younger brother, fearing that he would get eaten… Greg tried to stand up, but it was no use…
“RUN TONY!! LEAVE ME HERE!! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!” Tony didn’t want to leave his brother; but he didn’t want to get eaten as well. Selfishness got to him: he stood up and ran as fast and as far away as he
could, screaming for help, not knowing what to do and where to go. He looked behind him. He couldn’t see his brother anymore. He… disappeared.
After several minutes of running, Tony finally stopped. He then burst into tears. He felt guilty. He felt bad for
what he had done. He let his brother die! How could he? How DARE he? What kind of a brother was he? He wasn’t human… He was a monster… He was inhuman. He didn’t have any feelings… any feelings at all… The raindrops were still falling down from the sky, soaking the crying, guilty teenager…
The man was looking for his colleague at the car park. He was glancing everywhere, trying to find him. As he
turned his head to the left, he saw his colleague: he was running towards him.
“Sorry I’m late… Let’s start looking for them… But instead of splitting up, let’s look for them together…” his
colleague said.
Both of them left the car park at 6:05am and started to look for the two teenagers, hoping that
this time, they would find them...
Hours passed by. It was 8 am. The mountain rescue teams still haven’t had any luck in finding the two teenagers.
“My gosh, where are these people? They couldn’t have gone THAT far…” Dave said. Suddenly, they heard
something. It sounded like a whistle.
“Someone’s doing the distress signal!!” Dave’s colleague said, listening carefully and trying to figure out where
the sound was coming from.
“This way!” Dave followed his colleague into the woods. The trees were soaked and wet; the road was muddy and the birds weren’t even singing their morning song. Both of them followed the sound… and wandered for a while. After 8 minutes, they saw someone: it was one of the teenagers that they were looking for! He looked like a mess: his eyes were all red and puffy; he was kneeling on the muddy ground and his clothes were torn.
“THANK GOD YOU’VE COME!!!! You’ve GOT to help me find my brother, Greg!!” the boy pleaded.
“Weren’t you together? What happened?” Dave asked. The young teenager told them what happened slowly
and clearly…
“…and then I ran as fast as I could… when I looked behind me, my brother was gone… Please help me find
him!” The two men just looked at each other and then nodded. The three of them started to walk into the
woods, looking for Greg and yelling his name. After 3 hours of wandering, they finally found him: his eyes were closed; he was lying on the ground in a foetal position and his clothes were bloody. Tony immediately went to his younger brother and asked for forgiveness.
“I’m so sorry! I shouldn’t have left you there! What if the bear… killed you? I’m such a lousy brother! I will
NEVER leave you again!!” Greg didn’t answer. He just kept on being still and his eyes were tightly shut. Dave went to the teenager’s body and checked his pulse.
“Tony, I’m so sorry to tell you this…but…he’s gone.”
“WHAT? THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE!! THAT CAN’T BE! THAT CAN’T BE!!” Dave suddenly shook his shoulders with force.
“Tony! TONY!! WAKE UP!!” he said. “WAKE UP!!”
Tony suddenly woke up with a start. As he opened his eyes, he saw his younger brother’s face.
“WAKE UP TONY! We’re already here!” Tony was confused. Am I--in heaven? He asked to himself.
“We’re HERE! Stop daydreaming! We’re finally here, in the Lake District! We arrived!!” Greg said once again.
Tony looked at his surroundings: there were a lot of people. Some of them were talking to each other; some of them were getting out of the bus. He finally understood. Everything had just been a bad dream. Just an innocent nightmare…
“Wow!! I’m glad we decided to go here. It’s such a beautiful place! Where do we go first? How about there? All
my classmates keep on bragging about having been there, you know,” Greg exclaimed. Tony became surprised… Déjà vu?
(Dec. 2006)
P.S: I haven't seen this story in such a long time. I thought I lost it.
Wishlist
I know it's a bit pointless to write this, but better late than never.
A New Year has dawned, knocking at our consciousness's doors for us to be aware of the wise usage of time we're given. As always, it's up to us to whether to use what we're blessed with wisely, or perhaps, using it the other way around, dismissing its importance in the process.
It's the 16th of January, which means already more than half of the first month of this coming year is already part of our past -- and to me, it seems like only yesterday that I was staring at the popping fireworks from our balcony, the cold wind sending me shivers down my spine.
At the end of every year, I compose a list of things I intend to achieve in the imminent future; things I desire to attain in some point of my life, regardless of my age ... as long as, when I get to have children, I can turn my head around and reminisce in the past, showing them the values and lessons I tried to understand in the course of my life.
What surprised me at New Year's Eve of the year 2009 was the quantity of things I intended to reach in twenty-ten ... so I extended the deadline by a lifetime (number two will even take much more than that to fulfill!)
Anyway, I decided to write down everything that I want to accomplish in my life... because I'm sure that, with every day that passes by, this list will double or even quadruple -- which means the risk of forgetting some of them would increase... so yeah.
1. Have children.
I guess it's one of the most typical "things" most women want: they're cute, cuddly, loving, although at times too loud and annoying, especailly when you already have two humongous, dark rings beneath your eyes.
(Although, actually, I take that back: in this society where women are getting more and more emancipated, they'd rather focus on their careers instead -- which is not bad, either...
but remember what that psychology magazine whose name I forgot once said: "Happiness is not measured by accomplishments and materialistic things, but rather by relationships one has to others.")
But anyway... I want to have children because I think there is NOTHING which could replace the feeling of maternal/paternal love towards one's own flesh and blood.
-- Punkt, basta. Nothing more to say to that: the rest is too obvious to be written down. ;P
2. Find "Prince Charming", have a fairytale-like relationship with him and finally, share a healthy, honest marriage until we meet our demise.
I'm not expecting some sort of "Edward Cullen" (<--) to suddenly sweep me off my feet - not. Even.
I don't like Edward Cullen - I think he's too corny ... and come on, get real.
I guess I have this realist-modernist type of thing going on... you know. My version of Mr. Cullen is much better; much more REAL:
- a good-dresser- funny.
I think that's about it. See? Isn't my version of Edward much better than that caring,attractive,hot,well-dressed,nice blood-leeching vampire who leaves Bella for some twisted reason?
3. Study in some prominent, prestigious, "overrated" Ivy League school.
Let's just put it like this: they're overrated,expensive... so they're "GOOD".
...because according to us people and the media, the more money you invest into something, the better.
--- yet this time, no sarcasm, they ARE "better".
...4, 5, 6, 7,... etc.
I'd love to continue writing, but I'm afraid I have to go --- It's a New Year, and I have to invest my time into something more productive.
