Dawning swim

A small pitiful creature
stranded in a carnival
left alone
victimized
as a stigma in this world.
It looks around
sees nothing
but a gaudy sea of masks
artefacts of great complexity
and a shore of pure joy
Yet there it is
lonely
confused;an infamy in the swarm.

Slowly it continues
Lost in the depth
of the sheer intricacy
of the profound abyss it is in.
Unsure
it struggles
against its fear
suffocating in the ferociousness
of the waves of unfamiliarity
and its streams of tears.

The waves grow bigger
as it plunges into the crowd
its breathing getting heavier
parallel to every step
and every sound.

Closing its eyes
it grows silent.
The pitiless creature
drowns
in the sea of gaudy masks
into the endless limbo
of darkness and lies.

random ranting

I don't even know why I created my own blog.
What's the purpose of having it if I don't have any concrete musings to write about? It's just pathetic - so incredibly lame, so dull, so obtuse.

You know what's funny? The praises I get on the "genuine quality" of my writings. I just do not understand how people can be so tasteless. I understand the concept behind the "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" whatnot, but I just refuse to believe the absurdity of people liking anything I scribble on. I am not even able to finish writing a consistent train of thought!
People must be unbelievably screwed up to even read this crap.

So congratulations!
You just wasted about a minute of your time digesting this post you will never even think of in the coming years of your life.



What big, whiny losers we all are.

Society & bladiblah .

Although we all consider ourselves living in an open society full of gender equality and emancipation, it is inevitable to say that in this world, we'll always be held captive, imprisoned and chained - unless you live alone, isolated and secluded on a far, far away island distanced from society.

If you look around, you'll notice what I mean.

Daily life is based on a very intricate system which sustains itself as every group of person (commune, community) fulfills the task he has been assigned to. Just like the principles of wildlife and ecosystems, we human beings are part of a (based on ecology's "food web") "social web" which exists apart from the food web we already belong to (autotrophs -> primary consumers -> secondary consumers -> tertiary consumers -> ... ).
Taking this into consideration, it can be assumed that this "social web" merely manages itself if every group of person continues the task that is expected from it. So what does this really mean?

If you ask me, I'd say that because of that, we are the victims and captives of our own selves - not only of our own beings and minds, but of our own lifestyle. Through the further development of technology and further "improvements" that facilitate our way of living, we have locked ourselves up in a cage whose key has been thrown away and may never be found. We are bound to each other, expecting others to fulfill his "job" to be able to do ours - and to be able to survive. We have become co-dependent, although we claim to be emancipated and self-sufficient - imprisoned in this cycle which impedes us from truly breaking free.
 In a sense, we are like animals (heck, we are animals) with our own "species" and our own "populations" which complement each other to form a whole.

Is this what truly defines us? Are we really individuals who strive for our own goals and own aims, keeping business to ourselves as we tread on? Or are we just part of a collective group which contributes to the whole system for it to work? What defines every single one of us? What defines an individual? And if this is the case, why does racism still exist?

Renee.

(P.S. I'm sorry for the waffling - I still have to work on my ability in sorting out thoughts and writing them down.)

random sh*t

If a name is a tag, a term to address you with,what is really being?
What are you and who are you if the words that describe you are subjective, invented words which just facilitate the lifestyle of man?
What are you and who are you, if, in every place and every situation, you transform into somebody else, depending on who you are with, to optimize your own convenience?
What is this inconsistency which man has evolved with, this inconsistency which challenges man to doubt his existence as he slugs on in life to "please and fulfill" his own/or someone else's desires, even those of a "higher" being?
What really defines us, as an entity, as a human being?
Are we opulent servants who were given emotions which we are supposed to ignore with humility?
... Or are we the products of evolution; of the gift of Nature that, hypothetically, "sustains itself"?


The clock keeps on ticking - and I feel lost in time.


-Renee

WTF.

It's discouraging to see the society around you, not getting better since no one seems to care.It's draining to merely observe your surroundings, losing energy as you see the face of evil.
What has our society done? How low can it get?!

...and the worst part is, I'm part of this pile of sh*t.

sharing scrumptdelicious cookies

The following does not have anything to do with cookies, that's one thing.
I just love him - and the whole world does as well.
And if you don't know him, well, hopefully you'll love him as well.



Here you go! :)
Paulo Coelho




RENEE

Worth the Listen

A 100% ear orgasm guarantee.

Renée.

mi primer intento (me and my lousy Spanish skills.)

Esto será la primera vez que intentaré escribir en Espanol. Sé que este texto tendrá muchisimos fallos, pero por lo menos lo he intentado, eh?

Soy Renee, tengo diecisiete anos y vivo en Berlin. Cuando tenia tres, mi familia se mudó a Espana por el trabajo de mi madre. Nos quedamos en Madrid por siete anos, y cuando estaba en la tercera clase, volvimos a Filipinas. Supongo que esto es la razón porque mi Espanol no se ha desarrollado tanto. Yo pienso que eso es una lástima porque la literatura Espanola es magnífica y, bueno, a mi me encataría escribir asi tambien (ojalá). Y al hablar? Hay muchas palabras que se me olvidan. Que pena, no?

Que más puedo escribir? Ah, ya sé: me encanta la vida. Me encanta ver el sol al amanecer y la luna al brillar por la noche. Me encanta ver las estrellas luminosas y los árboles gigantezcos en los jardines de la gente. Me encanta observar los animales al cuidar a sus hijos. Me encanta todo lo que veo al despertarme por la manana.
Lo que no me gusta? El comportamiento de la humanidad - los mentirosos asesinos y hipócritos asquerosos.
Yo sé que es "parte de la vida", parte de esta sociedad... pero para mí, la vida no es la vida para otra gente. Para mi, la vida es la naturaleza y el estado del mundo sin incluir las consecuencias de los hechos de la humanidad. Para mi, la vida es esa esencia que nos deja sentir, esperar, querer, odiar ... No sé como explicarlo (y especialmente no en Espanol!), pero para mi, la vida es muchisimo más de lo que parece.

Espero que hayais entendido lo que quiero decir.
Besazos.

(P.S: Alguien puede recomendarme un periódico Espanol, algunos autores contemporares/clasicos o músicos que cantan en Espanol?)

The Artist

Trickling droplets of water
dripping soundlessly at dawn
singing birds
rejoicing
as the artist drew on
picturesque sunsets of cotton
meadows of green
-- silence
poisoned by beauty
his eyes barely see.

Zigzags and scribbles
in dark crimson red
caressing to and fro
the frail whiteness of death
shedding perspiration
chewing his bread
completing the last stroke
the last droplet of sweat shed.