FREEDOM

Have you ever noticed that people nowadays are fond of talking about life and freedom? Thinking, quoting, discussing, even writing laws about them?
We often mention how good it is to be free as a bird, as insouciant and carefree.
What we don´t seem to notice, however, is how frequently we seem to take these words for granted.


At this moment, there are estimately 6,824,000,000 people on this planet, eating, dancing, singing, loving, hating, sleeping, celebrating, mourning, regretting, thinking, reading, etc, as they live life according to "their own masterplan", according to their will ... or according to others´.
So what are the words life and freedom everyone´s talking about?
Today, I spent most of my precious time at home, studying (thank God for not letting me procrastinate as usual) for the heaps of exams heading toward me this upcoming week, when I suddenly stumbled upon a blog on the internet concerning freedom and life as I just finished reading the news online.
I didn´t know what to think about it; at first I just thought it was just another mundane and common emo blog with its poems and posts teeming with hopelessness and misery (some were really poetic, though), until I scrolled further down and continued my perusal and landed on a post called "Pathetic Illusions"---until which I was utterly flabbergasted.


Here´s an extract of the blog which I sent to someone on Facebook (the only part I had still been able to save before my mom suddenly appeared in my room, initiated a virus scan and cleared the internet´s history):

"Today I killed my hamsters, my cat Crook, Sheilas dog Arnie and hit my 3 year old sisters head with a hammer. At first I hesitated because I was scared of what everybody else would think then, but in the end, I decided to kill them except for my sister and to simply explain the others what had been coming through my head all this time. Besides, my parents are on a business trip, so Id have to take care of the mess sometime else.
Now, dont think that Im a psycho, I did this for a reason. Do you know how powerful countries decide to start wars just for the sake of proving the countrys power? I did the same and technically, that was my reason, too. I wanted to prove how I still had the power over my body and also the freedom the world has not yet taken away from me. I wanted to prove to myself that I still am an individual who doesnt have to follow the norms, the rules. Someone who can still do what he wants, unlike you and everyone else.
Youd think Im crazy, but I think otherwise: this world is the one who is. People dont do what they want just for the sake of getting others approval and consent. People deny their identity, deny their actions, just because of their fear of recieving others contempt. Why is murder illegal when death row is legalized in other parts of the world? My opinion is: why dont you all shut the fuck up and wake up? Life may suck, but its only because we all make it suck. I killed my pets, and I dont regret it."

To tell you the truth, I still am shocked to the core and my normally big appetite seems to have disappeared since the pictures she posted in her blog of her pets´ corpses are still furiously emblazoned in my head. I´m not sure as to whether she genuinely meant it or whether she merely bluffed.
...but the only thing I know is that I fully agree with Paulo Coelho, one of my favorite authors of all time:

"Freedom is not the absence of commitments, but the ability to choose-- and commit myself to--what is best for me."

Anyway, what do YOU think?

still craving for my personal freedom,

Renee.

Banana phobia

I have to confess something: I love bananas. I don´t know why, but I have this extremely intense inclination towards these yellow, finger-shaped fruits which make the bowel movement procedure much easier. I just love eating them--- the perfect dessert after a hearty meal.
That is, until yesterday.


Yesterday, I was at Beate Uhse (and for those of you who don´t know what it is, it´s an erotic shop where you can buy absolutely anything that fulfils your lascivious fantasies), accompanying a friend of mine to buy a little something she had been craving for these last few months.
I´m not there often... and in fact, the last time I was ,was when I bought leather thongs for a friend of mine as a prank gift for her 17th birthday (which was freaking expensive, mind you!).
You see, I´m not really into such kind of things......
I´m not sure why. I mean, I am open-minded.
(But maybe it´s because of the fact that I´m not exactly comfortable about e.g the thought of sticking something bigger and wider than a cucumber into any part of my body...unless it´s edible food, of course. And with edible, I mean 100% edible. And into the mouth. Oh-- And unless it´s a manifestation of love.)
Anyway, when we were there, I encountered the most peculiar-looking things.
Vivid, perverse images started to appear in my head, disarraying my train of thoughts and also the lunch I had had in my stomach. I felt as if I were in some horrid pornographic nightmare.
My friend then called my name...and I still thank God in my prayers for not letting me puke there and then.
So I went to her, and after having paid for the present, we went straight to her house where she had assembled several people for a costume houseparty she wanted to give.
The party wasn´t even half as bad: people were dressed up pretty creatively (I was dressed as the typical White Lady): there were Batmans and Zorros, Angela Merkels, ghosts, prostitutes and thugs... even wannabe psychotic doctors; I even met a nice gender-confused cowboy.
So after hours of dancing and chatting, I was on my way to my friend´s parents´ humongous bedroom where I had left my bag earlier,and upon entering the room, I was confronted with one of my lovely friends, teary-eyed, cracking up and stark naked.
Almost automatically, I asked her what was wrong, all the while thinking that I would have to hit her boyfriend into pieces any second now...
and well, guess what had happened? Let´s just say her boyfriend had put the banana that was laying on the dining table into the wrongest place.
I was shocked. My heart stood still---and then laughed. I laughed and laughed and laughed until I was about to asphyxiate myself from too much laughter. By the end of the evening, we were at the hospital(she donned on some clothes first, of course)... and well, ever since, I´ve promised myself NOT to go near to that hospital.
It was one of the most American-Pieish days of my life.

Moral of the story? Be careful with bananas. They´re more dangerous than you expect!



Renee

P.S: This is by far the most inept post in my blog, so...God, forgive me for I have sinned.

(WARNING: PICTURES MAY BE REVOLTING)

I just checked my e-mail and came across an old e-mail that had been forwarded to me a few months ago.
I wasn't (and still am not!) quite certain as to whether these pictures and article are genuine or not, but either way, I think it's something which is definitely worth showing the world.

AND AGAIN: This isn't mine. I'm just the messenger girl.

"Shocking to the conscience! Let's pray for them...

This is horrible, outrageous, and barbarous!

Brief translation: Shocking news circulated in China.

A town in Canton is now on trend taking baby herbal soup to increase health and sexual performance/ stamina. The cost in China currency = approx $4000.

A factory manager was interviewed and he testified that it is effective because he is a frequent customer.
It is a delicacy whereby expensive herbs are added to boil the baby with chicken meat for 8 hours boiling/steaming.

He pointed to his second wife next to him, who is 19 (he is 62), and testified that they have sex everyday. After waiting for a couple of weeks, he took this reporter to the restaurant when he was informed by the restaurant's manager that the spare rib soup (local code for baby soup) was now available.

This time, it was a couple who already had 2 daughters, the 3rd one a daughter again who the couple aborted when she was 5 months old.

Those babies close to be born and die naturally cost 2000 in China currency. Those aborted ones cost a few hundreds in Chinese Currency. Those couples who did not want to sell dead babies, placentas can be accepted also for couple of hundreds.

The question is: is this a consequence of what appears to be an excessive care for health or a backfire of China's introduction of the ''one child in a family policy'', since the majority prefers to have male babies and  poorer families end up selling their female babies?


Dear all,

This is so gross but at least we all know what is happening in this world.

"Father, forgive them for they do not know what they are doing."

Please pass on for a union of prayers. "

P.S: I hope you're not reading this during your lunch break. And by the way, some pictures to stimulate your appetite:

Pure randomness

It's been about a month since I've last been here, and frankly, my negligence hasn't made much of a difference, because honestly said, nothing much has changed (school, studies, books, friends, going out, parties... whatever).

Everything's just as it was and has mostly always been; although there is something that is pissing me off a lot these weeks. And that something would be called the pissing pissy weather.

March, April, May: usually my favorite months of the year; the time when the sun comes out of its dark corner and starts to smile upon the hopeless world; when flowers decide to bloom and be pleasing again for people who do care (an equivalent of none).
Yet as I may guess, this year is rather the contrary of my expectations as the only thing I get from all of this hoping is pissy,wet, depressing and wetter rain ... and dark clouds which lurk in every dark and bright corner menacing to burst into more pissy rain anytime soon.

I normally wouldn't make much of a fuss out of this; it's not exactly much of an issue, but frankly, just for the sake of being materialistic once and again (because everyone is, anyway), I miss wearing them.

Yes, I admit it. I miss wearing my stupid sunglasses 

and silly sandals

and silly shorts

without having to wear any fukking leggings underneath them.

Sometimes I just ask myself: God, when will the weather stop making everyone have the blues? And pissing?

When will the world just stop all the complaining which amounts to nothing but more misery in the end?

And God, why am I one of the greatest queen of the biggest miserable losers?

Pathetic, so pathetic. I might as well just delete my blog if I keep on writing this senseless crap here for everyone to see. Maybe I just will.

Anyway, whatever. I have to leave and continue this pathetic lima loser's life by hanging the clothes my sister and I had put into that annoying moaning gigantic washing machine which just explodes and shortcircuits every time.

Adios, my beloved lovely loving losers.

                                    Renée    


P.S: This makes me happy every time. And by the way, if you took me seriously, then dude, get a life, won't ya? (Why won't the freaking video show?!)